It seems that each time I write about a topic, it sends me to the next one. Last time, I wrote about playfulness and my realization that playfulness is a feeling that can be brought to anything I do and not necessarily an act itself. As the days passed and time moved on, I kept asking myself, “How do I become more playful?” I thought I was going to get an answer like “wear brighter colors” or “skip, instead of walk.” Yet, the surprising answer that came through was that in order to be more playful, I need to be more disciplined.
Odd, don’t you think? Isn’t discipline kind of serious? How could more discipline ultimately lead to more playfulness? Well, let me tell you about my thought process.
It is so easy to let the whirlwind of life take over every little bit of space in your mind, your heart, your life. Time just flies. I could spend all day doing a few tasks, and often those tasks have been weighing on my mind for quite some time. I need to grocery shop, get the laundry done, start writing my article, catch up on those phone calls, figure out how to use the new software, update my website, etc. I think what takes playfulness out of life is when we get into a state of resistance about these things and start obsessing on all that needs to get done instead of just doing it.
CREATE SELF-DISCIPLINE
I am really good at wasting time. I can think about doing something for days, weeks, months, even years, before actually doing it. Maybe some of this time is not wasted. When a big idea is waiting to move through me, it makes sense that I need time to sit with it, sleep with it, wrestle with it, and maybe even try to squash the idea to see if it really wants to be expressed. But most of the time, the angst I put myself through thinking about things that need to get done is unnecessary. I know very well what needs to get done and that I will eventually do it all, so it becomes a question of how much torture I want to put myself through before I relent and just do it.
So this is what brought me to focus on discipline. Entering just-do-it mode takes discipline. What does discipline look like? For me, it looks like creating time and space for what needs to get done: Immediately getting out of bed in the morning and sitting down on my meditation cushion. Feeling hungry and starting to cook instead of grazing on nuts and cereal. Knowing a writing deadline is coming up and making myself sit down and start in. Going to bed early. Paying the annoying bill and moving on instead of waiting to get late notices. Turning off the TV. A lot of these things are about not waiting.
Maybe we could equate discipline with not waiting. I think this feels better than the typical definition of discipline as the suppression of desire, or restraint, or self-control. What if getting to my yoga mat in the morning could simply be about not waiting any longer to feel good? What if I could approach all the things that come up in my life this way? Not waiting to take the next step. Not letting the idea of uncomfortable confrontations keep me in a fog.
NOW THERE’S SPACE FOR PLAY
Living with this kind of progressive discipline really does create space for play. I am sure you are familiar with the feeling of giddy relief, of lightness, that comes right after completing something major on your list. I often realize how much easier it was to just do it than I thought it would be, and how much less time and drama were needed.
And then I am free to play! And not only am I free to play, I get to play knowing that my life is moving forward. All the time I could spend waiting and worrying becomes available to explore a little bit more of life with a lighter heart.
So here is my call to you. Just do it. Whatever it is. Sign up for that continuing education class that has been on your mind for a long time. Collect the best pictures and words you can come up with in the next week and publish your business website—you have one free thanks to your ABMP membership. Gently cut ties with the person consuming to much of your energy. Set a date for increasing your prices and announce it to your clients, complete with a few testimonials from happy clients. I know these tasks may feel big and scary from your vantage point, but I promise, if you just keep breathing, completing, and walking forward, you will not regret it.
Jennie Hastings is a board-certified massage therapist, writer, and teacher. She is the creator of The Blossom Method and author of The Inspired Massage Therapist (Massage Blossom Books, 2012). She wants to be your friend on Facebook. Sign up for her monthly newsletter and check out her blog at www.massageblossom.com.