I went away on a yoga retreat in August, and while I was there I learned I need to play more. It was a recurrent theme, a very specific reflection from more than one person, and I could feel in myself the truth of what they were saying.
It is kind of funny, because my initial response to this discovery was, “But I am always playing!” How could I need to play more? My work is creative; isn’t that play? I spend time with my friends and family, and we are always playing together, be it cards, or skiing, or jumping on the trampoline. I am active and social, I know how to let my hair down, what am I not getting about playfulness?
When I asked myself what play means, the definition I came up with is that play is something we do for the enjoyment of the process—not for the finished product. The dictionary seemed to agree with me. Clarifying this did not help me understand what I may need more of in my life. As I looked up the definition of playfulness it began to dawn on me that it was not any specific action I needed to do more of, but a spirit of playfulness that could be applied to almost everything in my life.

An Innate Sense
Somehow I have become too serious about everything, including the things I do for fun and enjoyment. I do not know how this happened. I know that I long ago recognized the need for enjoyable activities in a healthy lifestyle, but somewhere along the way I have become too rigid about these activities. And really, maybe the playfulness I need in my life has nothing to do with what I am doing, and everything to do with how I do anything.
Where does a sense of playfulness come from? The answer that bubbles up inside me is that it comes from releasing heaviness, becoming lighter, and trusting more. What if life is a game? What if it is a game I could not lose? What if life is not a predetermined march to a known destination, but a grand experiment in what could be? Would that mean I would have to get comfortable with making mistakes? Would that mean I would have to spend more time in the zone of not knowing? It is becoming obvious what my resistance may be.
It is easy to become serious about life. People depend on us. There are bills to pay and mouths to feed. What is that old saying about death and taxes? But if death and taxes are the only certainties of life, could we table those worries? Just for a little while? Could we stop working so hard to fend off the inevitable and start inviting in the silly, the fun, and the joyful? Could we stop being so partial to the things we already know how to do and let ourselves be beginners again?
I realize these are a lot of questions. But perhaps a question is the hallmark of playfulness. What happens if I do this? Or that? Playfulness asks a question and does not worry about the answer. Playfulness knows that whether something works or not is not the point—it is the information we gather along the way about ourselves and our world that really matters.
The thing about playfulness is that it is an innate sense we were all born with, and we were never so good at it as when we were children. If you would like to bring more playfulness into your life, take some time to think about who you were as a child. What made you happy then? What made you jump up and down in anticipation? Was it a promised trip to a carnival or amusement park? Was it dancing? Softball? Climbing trees while barefoot? Whatever it was, remember, and try doing one of those things now. Did you like to create things out of construction paper, make papier-mâché masks, or bead jewelry? There are so many ways to play.

Into Our Bodywork
Do you want to play in your bodywork? Schedule a trade with another therapist and let him know you will be playing with your work and exploring some new moves. You will feel more confident trying them for the first time on a colleague instead of a paying client who is expecting you to be an expert. Once you gain confidence with the move, you can add it to your regular repertoire. Who knows? Maybe you will discover a technique that makes your work easier and more effective, and maybe that discovery will take your career in a whole new direction.
Most of all, remember that what you do is less important than how you do it. Even if you cannot add any play time to your schedule at the moment, try bringing a sense of playfulness to what you are already doing. Maybe this means taking another route to work in the morning so you can check out a view you don’t usually see. Maybe it means wearing a funny hat, or glasses, or some other visible signal of your willingness to play more. Maybe it means you make a funny face at yourself in the mirror first thing in the morning. It doesn’t matter what you do, only that you let yourself go, even just a little bit, into a place you don’t already have all figured out.
The mystery of healing and of life asks us to remember to connect with playfulness. It reminds us that something new and great can only come out of the brave willingness to do something unknown, and stepping into the unknown with a sense of lightness and fun is pretty much the only enjoyable way to do it. While what we do means everything, it also means nothing, and finding a way to play with this paradox is rejuvenating.

Jennie Hastings is a board-certified massage therapist, writer, and teacher. She is the creator of The Blossom Method and author of The Inspired Massage Therapist (Massage Blossom Books, 2012). She wants to be your friend on Facebook. Sign up for her monthly newsletter and check out her blog at www.massageblossom.com.